


Just Desserts[1]

by HipHopAnonymous



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Aziraphale Has a Vulva (Good Omens), Birching, Bottom Aziraphale (Good Omens), F/F, Fan Art, Figging, Ineffable Wives (Good Omens), Other, Spanking, Victorian, zine fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-24
Updated: 2020-03-24
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:47:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23298037
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HipHopAnonymous/pseuds/HipHopAnonymous
Summary: As part of their official duties, Crowley and Aziraphale pose as a housekeeper and parlourmaid, respectively, at a politician's home in Victorian England. Fortunately, they find plenty of time for their favorite sorts offraternizing.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 17
Kudos: 105
Collections: Love And Lust Through The Ages, Top Crowley Library





	Just Desserts[1]

**Author's Note:**

> [1] Having been a formerly fussy English major, the author of this story wishes to assure readers that she knows the correct spelling of this idiom is “Just Deserts” (no, really, look it up!) The common, though incorrect, spelling has been used here so as to maintain consistency with the joke concerning Aziraphale’s weakness for sweets.
> 
> **This is the second of my fics for AZ Fell's Erotica: Love and Lust Through the Ages!**
> 
> **SquigglyInk did a wonderful illustration which you can see[HERE](https://twitter.com/SquigglyInk/status/1242923000661344258?s=20)**

Aziraphale was a terrible parlourmaid. She overslept, allowed the fires to burn out, and broke an alarming amount of china. However, should anyone ask the Mistress why Miss Fell was kept in her employ, she would fall into a confused stupor and answer vacantly, “Oh, I don’t bother with staffing. Miss Crowley sees to that!” As housekeeper, Miss Crowley did far more _seeing to_ Miss Fell than the Mistress could ever imagine.

The Master was a member of parliament under Queen Victoria, though he struggled to navigate the deluge of temptations such politicians are wont to face. The housekeeper took liberties to remind him that little bribes and favors were expected in his position, inconsequential in the grand scheme of his work. Just as often, the parlourmaid, while serving the Master tea, would encourage that he consult his Bible before acting, just like the honest, charitable, _God fearing_ man she knew him to be. The end result was a cancelling out of intentions, which an angel and a demon had long since realized was more or less the point. Unperturbed, they spent most of their time at more interesting activities.

On any given day, a crash could be heard from the dining room signaling yet another broken dish. The servants would shake their heads, knowing the housekeeper would be dragging the clumsy parlourmaid by her ear out to the little grove of birch trees in the yard. Miss Fell would be forced to collect a bundle of thin, whippy twigs, lift her skirts, drop her bloomers, and — fussing all the way — lean against a tree. Miss Crowley was always strict, ordering her to _stick that naughty bottom out!_ She would then whip the girl _thwick! thwup! thwick!_ smartly across her plump buttocks. Miss Fell always stamped her feet and wailed as the birch rod painted her bottom a stinging, welted red.

Sometimes, if Miss Fell had been particularly naughty, Miss Crowley stopped by the kitchen on their way out to ask the cook to peel some ginger root. The cook, angry about the puddings she suspected Miss Fell had nicked (she had), always grinned gleefully while carving an unnecessarily thick little finger. She knew very well that it was going up Miss Fell’s bunghole, and that it would deliver a frightfully wicked burn while the girl was whipped on the bare bottom for her most recent transgression. _Just desserts_ , indeed.

Little did anyone else know that after Miss Fell was exquisitely punished, she was always lovingly tended to. Her sore bottom soothed with soft caresses, the tears kissed away from her face, and the flower betwixt her thighs expertly gardened and _watered_ to soaking. How scandalized the family would be to learn that a serpent had found its way into Miss Fell’s fruitful vine![2] So much was her pleasure that it was quite possible all those china plates were sacrificed _on purpose_ , though Miss Fell would flutter her long, pale lashes at Miss Crowley’s accusations and mutter, “Nonsense!”

Sapphic proclivities were rarely considered amongst lawmakers and generally invisible to society at large, so they found they could be rather blatant without arousing much suspicion at all. The servants would often comment on the _passionate friendship_ they shared; how wonderful it was for Miss Crowley to take the hopeless Miss Fell under her wing. Though all but two were ignorant to just how _taken_ the parlourmaid truly was by the housekeeper in _every_ sense of the word.

**Author's Note:**

> 2A clever Victorian euphemism for cunt.[return to text]
> 
> [Twitter](https://twitter.com/HipHopAnonymou9)
> 
> [Tumblr](https://hiphopanonymousao3.tumblr.com/)


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